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Reviews for ~Once Burned~

By : Metranome
  • From ANON - DarkRoseDamael on May 19, 2005
    very good chapter. things are going good. is hiei going to go back to yusuke? and ask him about what happend now?
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  • From ANON - CWolf on May 19, 2005
    I think you're doing an excellent job building up this relationship. The pace of it is feasable and the character's thoughts really give the story some depth. This is probably the only H/K I'll every read! Keep up the good work.
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  • From ANON - Dia on May 19, 2005
    oooh... i like how the story is going since ch. 2 when i last read. i think their relationship, so far, is developing in a believable way while allowing for some character development that goes beyond what we saw in the anime. (after all, if hiei got pissed and ran off every time kurama tried to do anything, nothing would ever happen.) your interpretation of who hiei and kurama really are is so unique and yet fits so well with the (relatively little) insight we'd gotten into their characters in the series. my only suggestion at this point would be for you to add a little more description in what is happening. although you've got the dialogue (both internal and external) and the chatacerization down really well, when you describe the actual situations it seems to be missing something. it sort of comes out like 'kurama did this, hiei did that, kurama thought this,' etc. maybe you could try adding a bit more detail to really show us what the characters see, taste, feel-if its pleasure, confusion, warmth, pain, whatever. i can see how you would want to avoid going overboard with flowery graphic description, particularly with your writing style, but i think it could use a little more.... something. anyway, that's my only criticism, and i wouldn't have bothered if i didn't totally love this story. so, please continue, and if you think i don't know what i'm talking about, feel free to ignore me but keep writing :) can't wait to read more!
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  • From ANON - C on May 19, 2005
    Awwwww! I have to say... I LOVE IT! I am just a sucker for Kurama x Hiei stories, but really, you are doing a wonderful job! Keep up the good work!
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  • From ANON - Hotaru1421 on May 18, 2005
    Keep going! Please write more! I wanna know what happens! E-mail me whenever you update.
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  • From ANON - C on May 17, 2005
    I thought that I would drop a word of encouragement. I really like where this is going and you are doing well with keeping them in character. Good luck!
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  • From ANON - december wind on May 16, 2005
    Short and sweet :D
    I'm hoping this will be more of a Kurama x Hiei fic than a Hiei x Kurama one.
    (Though I like how things are going regardless of erm, who's on top)
    One thing for sure, your Kurama is definitely refreshing!
    I'm so glad he's not crying~ (sobs)
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  • From ANON - DarkRoseDamael on May 16, 2005
    very good. umm.. im brain dead...did i review this chapter of the 2nd one before? either way i love this fic!
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  • From ANON - CWolf on May 16, 2005
    Keeping characters IC is one thing but I think if your going to write a story you're going to have to bend the characterizations a little. I mean it would be boring if the characters remained static and din't grow throughout the plot. As long as you put in a little explanation as to why a character behaves the way the do it's fine. So I think you doing a wonderful job, especially at keeping such a high quality of work.
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  • From ANON - Eye of Ra on May 15, 2005
    lol. [at your end author note]

    i still love how this is going. ^^ and i can't wait to see how you're gonna have Kura convince Hiei. heh. but no matter... i'm sure you'll do an awesome job at it. ^_^ lol. and i know i am going to sound repetitive and basically cliche.. but its all i can think of! LOL. sorry... XD but still.. you have my vote of confidence. keep up the great work! ^^ lol.
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  • From ANON - Min on May 15, 2005
    It's simply amazing that you manage to write a story with content like this, yet still keep the characters perfectly in character. Though, Hiei being confused and nervous and showing it is rather strange, but I suppose we all do it. Well done and I hope you continue soon.
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  • From ANON - clowangel on May 15, 2005
    Absolutely awesome fanfic. :) Continue soon.
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  • From ANON - Thundercat on May 14, 2005
    Thank you! Thank you! FINALLY a GOOD Hiei/Kurama fic that dosen't make them act all mushy and girly! I am a girl, but I am pleaseed to see a realistic Hiei/Kurama. *Hugs the author.*
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  • From mhmartini on May 14, 2005
    Very nice update. I could envision the conversation perfectly, and Yusuke falling off the chair was priceless. It seems Hiei has a lot to think about. I look forwad to seeing how you develop this. About the Hiei as a hippie sex therapist thing; I had just watched Meet the Fockers, and the most OOC thing I cold picture was Hiei replacing Barbara Streisand (sorry if I butchered the spelling there) as Ros Focker. I'm still shuddering from the mental imagery. But it wwould definitely be OOC; maybe even OOU (Out of Universe).

    Back on topic: I am really enjoying your story and am eagerly awaiting the next installment.
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  • From ANON - Dia on May 14, 2005
    Oh wow... you know, I rarely read h/k fics anymore because of my (apparently common) irritation with how out of character they are and the unlikely way their relationship is inevitably portrayed. Kurama is ever romantic, effeminate, hyper-sensitive, and hiei is all melodramatic angst and far too sexually knowledgable for someone who refuses to get close to anyone. I saw your summary and kind of though, 'yeah, I'm sooo sure your story will be different....' and was happily proved wrong. Only two chapters in and I'm hooked. I'd love to see where this goes so please, please, please continue. No grammar mistakes (at least none that I noticed), great dialogue, and I like the ironic, subtle humor in your writing. Also thought your description of Hiei at the beginning was very cool and original. Though I love him to death, he's not exactly your typical bishounen type, and I liked how you didn't idealize him like everyone else does. Can't wait to read more!
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