Adult-FanFiction.org : YuYu Hakusho

Compromised	By : Dementian Category: Yuyu Hakusho > Yaoi - Male/Male > Kurama/Kuwabara Views: 2033 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Chapter List
- 5
- 6
- 7
In the world of demons there was an air, an aura, that all knew and respected. It was the field of energy that swirled about two fighters, the clash of ki and the spark of bloody battle which might rage for hours or days. The stronger the pair, the longer the battle, but as Hiei and Kurama faced one another on the outskirts of a black and wiry forest, they both knew this battle would be short. The reasons behind it were not for conquest or treasure, not for fame or glory.... Instead, this fight was for pain; for its end.
   Hiei stood before Kurama, his hands clasped firmly behind his back, his supple black hair flitting in the hot wind that swept between them. Kurama’s arms were laced over his chest, feet spread in a weak fighting stance.
   Hiei had been goading him for a fight all day, ever since Kurama had woken up and attempted to find something to eat on the bug. Throughout the day Hiei would not let him be, and had followed him as he had left the bug to take a walk on the edge of the woods before Kazuma could track him down. They were before one another now because Kurama had run out of time, room, and reasons to avoid Hiei. He’d officially hit the dead end. Hiei knew it.
   “It is down to you, and it is down to me,” Hiei began. “Psychiatrists could not help you, your lover could not reach you; I will now do both. Painfully.” He growled the word.
   “Are you threatening me, Hiei?” Kurama asked, his voice still rather raspy from the lye and therapy. “Because I don’t see that ending well for you.”
   But Kurama’s words were flimsy and weak, much like his battle stance, and he knew that it would not take Hiei long to beat the truth from him. Kurama trusted Hiei, believed in him, and knew that Hiei (for all his shitty mouthing off) would help him if Kurama only gave him the opportunity. Kurama knew what Hiei needed, an incentive to fight. He was waiting now like a snake in the grass, still before the strike.
   Hiei narrowed his almond eyes.
   “Fight me and reclaim your honor,” he demanded.
   “My honor?” Kurama repeated.
   “Your honor is tarnished,” Hiei explained, his tone snide and forbearing. “You have quarreled with yourself and lost.” He said it coldly. “Your mind is a skewed and disgusting place filled with marring memories of loving embraces now cold and dead; your skin is itching for the arms of a woman you will never be able to hold again. You are laid low by yourself. You have committed social dishonor, emotional sabotage... and you have insulted your mother’s memory. Fight me, and reclaim your honor.”
   Kurama ground his teeth at the mention of Shiori, for every one of Hiei’s accusations were on point and ugly to confront.
   “... Hiei, do not mention her-“
   “Shiori,” Hiei said the name. It was like a knife twisted in Kurama’s gut.
   Kurama glared at Hiei, but Hiei did not relent nor back down. The snake was now moving in the weeds.
   “... Shiori,” Hiei said the name again, over and over, making Kurama’s upper lip jump in a maddening haze of rage, “Shiori, Shiori, Sh-“
   Kurama’s vision went red; he reached to his choppy hair and summoned-
   “ROSE WHIP!”
~*~
   Kurama had wanted solitude and silence but had found neither all day as Hiei continually harassed him for a fight. Kazuma was powerless to stop them, to be fair he knew that he shouldn’t interject when Hiei was attempting to help Kurama, and so when Kurama had vanished to the wood with Hiei hot on his tail, Kazuma had let him go. Mukuro had said that if Kazuma wanted to find her she would be on the upper terrace, and so Kazuma had asked Kirin for instructions on how to reach it and found her there watching the ground below like a hawk from up high.
   The roof of the BUG was smooth and metal, tapered round the edges and a good place to keep look out with such a high vantage point. It had to be at least twenty to fifteen stories high... it was difficult to know for sure, but Kazuma was certain it was at least over ten. A spiral staircase took a viewer up a tightly wound walk that ended in a trap door that could be unlatched and thrown back. It was already cast aside, letting in fresh air and hot crimson light from the outer world. Kazuma was starting to not notice the stench of corpses so much, but he was certain that upon returning home all his clothes would have to be incinerated. God forbid anyone catch him smelling like a dead body at work. Storms were brewing overhead, making the air feel thicker than usual, and Kazuma wondered if it was going to rain.
   She stood some ways off, her arms both metal and flesh over her chest, her red sash flitting about in the haggard and hot breeze. If she noticed his presence, she said nothing. He felt slightly sick as he looked down over the sliding edge of the roof, noting that should he fall now, he would die immediately upon hitting the ground... that would not be a clean or comfortable way to go. Swallowing his fear, Kazuma walked forward with cautious steady steps and stood beside Mukuro.
   Down below, he had a perfect view of the outskirts of the woods, and could see all the way into their depth to where a valley lay on the other side littered with villages. Mountains covered the north in the far distance, and to the west there lay a massive sprawling forest even more grand and dark than the small one by which they stood. To the east, more valleys and plains. To the south, the looming empire of dark and ugly cliffs on the other side of a foul wood.
   “I thought you might seek me out,” Mukuro stated. Kazuma looked at her, noting that her normal eye seemed quite calm and relaxed. “Hiei has Kurama quite... entertained.”
   Kazuma looked over the side, and his stomach clenched with worry as he saw Hiei and Kurama fighting viciously. Kurama was slashing at Hiei with his whip, darting through the trees and no doubt trying to gain ground, but Hiei was following relentlessly with his sword in hand. The pair of them were fast, and difficult to keep a watch on, but Kazuma knew from the sounds of shouting and angry conversation that this was not really a battle of whips and swords but of words. This moment, this scene, was what Kazuma had brought them to demon world for.
   Hiei would beat the grief out of Kurama; he would give him no choice but to deal with it.
   “Perhaps this shall soothe him,” Mukuro said, and Kazuma had no idea if she was talking about Kurama or Hiei. “Hiei has been known to go for days when he’s in the mood.”
   “... I hope Kurama can find some peace in it,” Kazuma murmured. If this fight went poorly, their entire trip would have been for nothing and Kazuma would be back to square one with no ideas on how to help Kurama.
   He did not want to be back to square one. Not when it involved nightmares, and a comatose state.
   “He will.” Mukuro seemed quite content in the fact. “This is our way. Humans are soothed by love. Demons are soothed by blood. When the wounds of time become too great to bear, we make our own wounds and cut them deep into our skin. As our flesh spills out, so our hearts are cleansed.”
   The image was macabre and made him queasy. He grimaced at Mukuro and found her grinning at him.
   “... You think Hiei can reach him?” Kazuma asked, simply because he was so very eager to get off the topic of blood and guts.
   “Mmm.” Mukuro nodded, looking back out over the battle which had now taken Hiei and Kurama into the heart of the forest. Even from such a distance, he could still hear them screaming faintly in the wind.
   “I WILL EAT YOU TO THE BONE AND BREAK YOU BETWEEN MY FINGERS!”
   “YOU!? YOU CAN’T EVEN TELL YOUR OWN SISTER THAT YOU LOVE HER!”

   “If there is anyone in this world or the next that understands grief and how to handle it... it is Hiei,” Mukuro said. Kazuma did not necessarily agree with that statement.
   “What makes you say that?” Kazuma asked, “Hiei always had this anger problem when he was working with me.”
   Mukuro just laughed, tickled by his words.
   “Hiei has never not had an anger problem, Kuwabara,” Mukuro agreed with a soft smile, “His anger is his way of explaining his emotions. Like the vivid hues of oil and paint, his anger has different emotions layered underneath.” She gestured with her hand out before her, like an artist at his brush, “Consider... calm, subtle irritation.” Mukuro smiled, “When all is well with the world. Then this anger-” She pointed to the forest where they could see Hiei and Kurama dancing in and out of tree tops, “Hot and fresh, emotional and raw-“
   “Concern,” Kazuma supplied.

   “Indeed.” Mukuro smiled, dropping her hand to lace her fingers behind her back.
   But it still made absolutely no sense to Kazuma, whose own anger had never been so sharp nor as ugly as Hiei’s. Why was Hiei so damn angry all the time? Why the shitty attitude? Why the abrasive personality? Fuck, it wasn’t like any of them had ever tried to hurt him or take advantage of him in a moment of weakness. Didn’t that make them at least somewhat trustworthy in Hiei’s eyes?
   “What is his deal, though?” Kazuma asked, for if anyone knew about Hiei’s personality it would be Mukuro. “Why is he always like this?”
   Mukuro frowned.
   “Hiei has much grief in his heart,” she said. “You know this.”
   “I do?” Kazuma replied, for if he did that was news to him. He didn’t know shit about Hiei.
   Mukuro looked at him. “You’re Hiei’s teammate. A friend, even... and yet you don’t know?”
   “Well I mean, he never really let us in,” Kazuma admitted. “Kurama knows the most, but even he doesn’t know a lot.”
   “Mmm.” Mukuro looked back out over the wiry forest.
   A silence suddenly grew between them and the more it dragged on the more Kazuma felt uneasy about the subject of Hiei’s supposed grief. Where had Hiei come from? What was his story? How had he and Yukina even gotten separated in the first place, and why was it that Hiei couldn’t tell her he was her brother (even when it was obvious she knew)? Why all the secrets, the lies, the hating?
   Kazuma wondered.
   “Did something... bad happen to Hiei?” Kazuma asked.
   “Many things.”
   Kazuma winced.
   “Did... someone hurt him-“
   “Many people.”
   “Are they still alive?”
   Mukuro cocked a head at this, deliberating. “I believe so, yes.”
   Kazuma looked out over the trees, where Hiei was dancing from branch to branch wearing Kurama down with each blow of his sword.
   “I could get revenge for him,” Kazuma mused, for it wouldn’t bother him to lift a sword to defend Hiei if it helped Hiei to understand that he was a friend. Shit, maybe Hiei might even be nicer to him.
   Mukuro was shaking her head, smiling. It seemed his words had charmed her, for she gave him an endearing look.
   “No, there’s no need for that,” she assured him. “Hiei will get revenge when he is ready. He too is traveling down the road of grief and pain. When it’s time, he will handle it his own way.”
   It was easy to imagine, when Mukuro was speaking in such a tone and using such lovely words, that she was calm all the time and could inflict no harm. Yet Kazuma had seen Hiei’s body, the proof of the damage Mukuro could do. Hiei was no push over; he did not go down without a struggle... and something that could bring Hiei to his knees was something that needed to be treated with utmost care and caution. Yusuke’s words were starting to make a great deal of sense to Kazuma.
   Mukuro was dangerous. She was not evil, conniving, or rude like Hiei but she was dangerous.
   And yet...
   When Hiei had run his hand upon her shoulders; when he had looked at her across the room and done her bidding silently... when she’d grabbed him by the elbow...
   “You really give him a sense of peace,” Kazuma said, for even though they bickered, it could not be denied that Hiei had been calmer around Mukuro. Almost... docile. “I noticed that the other day.”
   “Do I?” Mukuro asked, slightly coy in tone. She smiled a little at Kazuma.
   “You touched him, the other day... you grabbed his elbow. And he ran his hands over your shoulders. I noticed that,” Kazuma explained. “And when you asked him to stay, he did, even though he looked like he wanted to run. That’s love in Hiei’s language, I guess,” Kazuma finished lamely. Really, he was no expert on Hiei’s emotions. If anything, he was a victim.
   “Perhaps it is.” Mukuro shrugged; their conversation was momentarily jarred as a cracking, splintering sound filled the air and a massive tree in the forest came railing down into the woods that surrounded it. Ravens took flight, cawing overhead as they whistled past, almost eye level with Mukuro and Kazuma. They could hear Kurama shouting now, his voice loud and angry, emotional and heavy with guilt.
   “I CANNOT-!”
   “Oh, come now, not the foliage,” Mukuro grumbled. “Focus on the battle and stop dicking around, Hiei.”
   “What’s he doing?” Kazuma asked, suddenly quite nervous. Kurama had sounded almost in pain when he’d shouted. Damnit, was Hiei hurting him?
   “Hiei is going to run Kurama into the ground so that Kurama has no choice but to face his emotions. A very smart tactic when facing someone so analytical and calculating. Take their logic away from them, and let them flounder...” Mukuro smiled smugly. “Yes, Hiei is nothing if not a brilliant strategist.”
   There was something in the way she said it, something appraising and proud.
   Here was the woman that loved Hiei. Kazuma could hear it in her voice, see it in her face. The expression of longing that lovers so often wore. Even half marred by scars, Mukuro still looked lightly flustered as she said Hiei’s name.

   “... How did you meet?” Kazuma asked. Mukuro blushed, looking at him warily.
   Kazuma did not mean to be so nosy, but he was very curious.
   “Was it love at first sight?” He jested.
   “No.” Mukuro snorted, looking away. “It was not.”
   She snorted to herself again, but Kazuma could see her expression slipping into deep thought. Perhaps she was remembering.
   “Hope he wasn’t too mean to you,” Kazuma joked. “You can’t take hurtful words back.”
   Mukuro smiled at him, and Kazuma could tell he was amusing her.
   “He came to me to die.” Mukuro said.
   Kazuma did a double take, his grin slipping off his face.
   “For six months I unleashed over five thousand A-class apparitions on him and let him battle his way out in the torture chambers. It exhausted him... forced him to confront his demons.” She gestured out to the woods, where things had suddenly gotten very quiet, “Then I brought forth a person who, though I did not know it at the time, would force the final confrontation... the final end.” Mukuro paused, reflecting, “They battled to the death. Hiei wanted to die, and so he committed simultaneous seppuku by the other’s sword. A truly honorable death, an exquisite battle that I have never seen topped. It lasted, perhaps... five seconds.” Mukuro gestured, “I was determined to have him in my service after that. I revived him and made him the head of my army... and Kirin lost his position.”
   Suddenly Kazuma could see why Kirin hated Hiei. Hiei had stolen his damn job.
   But- Hiei had tried to die? Nobody had ever mentioned that to him! He wondered if anyone else knew- if suddenly he was the first person to be let in on a secret.
   Now he was starting to see why Kurama and Yusuke had been so silent about Hiei’s position and problems. It was very weighing to know something as heavy as a “Hiei-secret”.
   “... Why did he want to die?” Kazuma asked.
   Mukuro looked away.
   It became clear that she was unwilling to answer, and Kazuma realized he’d pushed too far. Now that he thought about it, it was none of his damn business why Hiei had wanted to die. He was just glad Hiei hadn’t died.
   “Well, I’m glad you saved him,” Kazuma murmured. Mukuro looked back at him, and there was a smile upon her face again.
   “Hiei is usually quite determined to live,” Mukuro said. “It was easy to re-spark his interest.”
   “Yeah, he was always kickin’ ass back when we fought together-“ Kazuma agreed, but his words were cut off when a terrible gut wrenching scream filled the air. More birds flew from trees, and Kazuma looked around with a start.
   That had sounded like Kurama.
   “Be at ease,” Mukuro said quickly. “That was not a scream of physical pain.”
   But now Kazuma was starting to get very concerned; Hiei was callous and difficult to manage, his temper could flare up without warning and damage anyone who was too close. If Kurama was on the receiving end of an undeserved blast, it could end him. He barely had enough strength to move about now a days- a fight had been too much to ask for.
   “This is why you came here,” Mukuro reminded him. “Let Hiei do what he must.”
   “Damnit, I don’t know if this is a good idea anymore.” Kazuma took a step towards the trap door.
   Mukuro did not make to stop him; would she think him rude if he left?
   Kazuma did not know this woman, did not know how she might react if displeased... but Kurama needed him; that alone was worth Mukuro’s rumored wrath.
   Besides. She loved a man. Perhaps she’d understand.
   Kazuma turned and ran for the trap door.

   It took far too long for his liking to reach downstairs, and when he managed to get to the lift he only waited for it to be lowered half way before jumping out and hitting the ground at a run. The impact jarred his ankles, but Kazuma didn’t care, taking off for the woods where he could hear faint screaming.
   He had not run so fast in a while, and the adrenaline rush of oxygen burning wildly through his lungs made his fingers and toes tingle. He made it to the woods and headed straight for the center, unsure of where he’d find Kurama or what condition he would be in. Part of him was afraid, part of him was angry, but all of him was concerned in that moment as Kurama’s wail of agony echoed in his mind.
   He followed the sounds of muted battle until he came to a grotto in the woods where massive tree trunks made for thick obstacles around the fighters path. Both Hiei and Kurama were sweating, battling hand to hand now instead of with sword and whip. Kurama was shaking wildly, whether from adrenaline or pain, Kazuma could not tell, but he hung back for a moment on the frame of their vision as Hiei kept his hands up and prowled about Kurama. He leered and weaved, a flickering flame that threatened to melt the flesh of all who touched it.
   “You knew she was mortal, that one day she would die; you did not prepare yourself for the loss! This is your punishment!” Hiei snarled; Kazuma’s mouth tensed into a fierce frown, ready to step out into a clearing, but Kurama was still putting up a fight, putting up a stance... dammit if Kurama was fighting then shouldn’t Kazuma let him?
   Was this the right thing to do?
   God... Kazuma didn’t know. It terrified him.
   “One cannot prepare themselves for the loss of a loved one!” Kurama was shouting.
   “Yes, you can!” Hiei snarled right back, “You can detach, you can build, you wait for the storm to arrive with a house made strong, not of cards!” He threw out a hand wildly. “You folded as fragile as one of your flowers, and you dare to blame fate? You did this to yourself, Kurama!” Hiei pointed at him.
   “I could never detach from her!” Kurama screamed, the very idea clearly appalling to him, but Hiei just kept pushing.
   “The love she gave you was like a drug; it made you forget the pain, but you drank too deeply from it and now you must face the pain without its soothing presence!”
   ... Hiei was actually starting to... make sense.
   It was unnerving.
   “And is that why you avoid Yukina, Hiei?!” Kurama taunted. Kazuma had never heard him make such a blow at Hiei, and knew it was a sign that Kurama was running out of places to hide. Hiei’s words were reaching him. “To avoid drinking from the well of her love? Do you smell her soap and wish you could hold her? Do you?” Kurama screamed.
   “Shiori’s love for you made you just as weak as it did strong!” Hiei shouted, not fazed in the slightest by Kurama’s ugly blow. “You know this! The weakness that muddles your mind has her hand on it just as much as the strength behind your whip does! You must take what you can from her, build with it a memory of goodness, and detach! Detach and let go!” Hiei’s eyes blazed at the command.
   “NO!” Kurama screamed, that same kind of gut wrenching scream Kazuma had heard from atop the BUG. Now, so close, the scream was deafening as it was heart-wrenching, but Hiei did not flinch or flee.
   “Then you will never leave this place,” Hiei said, his voice eerily soft as he touched his head.

   The indication was clear: the psych ward. Kurama screamed and threw himself at Hiei.
   They clashed with fists, punching each other senseless as they fell to the ground. They rolled momentarily, each battling to remain on top where their punches would be most effective, but in the end Hiei won out as he kicked a leg between Kurama’s and pinned him to the ground. He was straddling Kurama by the waist, looking weirdly sensual with Kurama had he not been punching him relentlessly in the chest, neck, and face. It was terrifying for Kazuma to watch but watch he did... because he knew Hiei could hit a whole lot fucking harder than he was.
   Hiei was holding back, but Kurama was still breaking beneath him.
   “Let it go!” Hiei roared, punching Kurama hard in the jaw. “Detach from the drug that makes you weak and grow strong in your sobriety!”

   “I cannot live as you do, Hiei!” Kurama shouted, “I cannot cut myself off from love-!”
   “It is not love, it is weakness!” Hiei punched Kurama in the face again, and Kurama made a noise of pain as the blow connected with the side of his eye; it would surely leave a bruise, “Love does not suck you so dry of yourself! Love does not destroy you when it leaves you!”
   “Oh, so that’s why you wept like a child when Yukina gave you soap-“
   Hiei’s face flushed an ugly red, his expression changing from stern control to a brief angry rage in a flash. He punched Kurama hard in the mouth, and Kurama gasped. Hiei grabbed Kurama by the collar, shaking him hard so that his head smacked the ground.
   “Shiori loved you, treasured you, adored you, but she is dead now,” Hiei spat venomously. “You gave her twenty five years of honest living, of nourishing stability and support- do not deny your own involvement in her happiness.”
   “I was a bastard-“ Kurama choked out, blood issuing from the corner of his mouth; Hiei did not care, shaking him still harder so that Kurama’s head hit the ground again.

   “We’re all bastards, Kurama!” Hiei roared, and his fury was to such a point that Kazuma was certain Hiei had screamed this several times during their argument. “It’s who we are!”
   Kurama’s eyes opened, and they stared up in vacant awe into the canopy above Hiei’s head. A few silver leaves drifted down, a hot wind blew gently by, but neither fighter moved.
   “... That’s who we are,” Hiei said, his voice now at speaking level. “We can be no other way. But your co dependance upon her love is going to destroy you if you can’t learn to let go. Take what you can from it, allow her memory to fill you up in times of darkness, but for the love of God don’t drown in your pain like a child.” Hiei glared at Kurama, “Shiori wanted you to live long and to prosper in health and happiness. That was her final wish. See it come true... or dishonor her forever.”
   Kurama just kept looking up at the canopy.
   “... I never told her,” he whispered. Kazuma could hear the pain in his voice.
   “... I understand,” Hiei replied.
   Kurama’s eyes flitted to Hiei’s face. He reached up a dirty and scraped hand, and gently grabbed the shirt upon Hiei’s shoulder. The black cloth was frayed and old, going easily with Kurama’s tight grip as he slowly sat up. Hiei slumped back, now sitting upon Kurama’s lap in a way that made Kazuma slightly uncomfortable save for the fact that he knew Kurama loved him and not Hiei.
   Hiei touched Kurama’s brow where a silver leaf had fallen into his red hair and plucked it out.
   “Your weakness has made you soft,” Hiei murmured. “Before you would have killed yourself with ease.”
   “Well, really, you need to thank Kazuma for that,” Kurama said, a slight smile playing upon his bloodied lips. “Had it not been for him, I would not be here.”

   Kazuma’s heart skipped a beat in the shadows.
   “So the fool does have a use after all.” Though his words were rude his tone was strangely... appreciative.
   “Yes. He does,” Kurama said, and Kazuma could now hear the affection in both their voices, see it in both their faces as they gazed upon one another.
   For a moment Hiei simply sat and stared at Kurama. Then, he hugged him.
   Kazuma’s jaw dropped, and he instinctively covered it with a hand.
   Hiei did not hug with experience or warmth, but Kurama’s face was wide with shock and even delight. He looked at the back of Hiei’s head from where it was nestled upon his neck, and seemed utterly amazed as he reached up to put his arms around Hiei.
   “I’m glad,” Hiei muttered, and though his tone was spiteful his grip was incredibly tight around Kurama.
   For a moment, the only sound was them breathing. Kurama’s expression grew from delight to emotional grief, his eyes filling with tears though they did not fall. He still smiled, biting his lip as he held Hiei.
   Kazuma realized he was not emotional over Shiori for the first time in quite a long time.
   Kurama brought a hand up to Hiei’s head, and cradled it, his dirty fingers sliding through the short black locks. Hiei nuzzled his face into Kurama’s own, just the slightest show of affection that could barely be registered if one hadn’t been paying close enough attention.
   They sat back, observing one another again. Hiei slid out of Kurama’s lap, relaxing upon the forest floor as he retightened his bandana over his ominous third eye.
   “Thank you Hiei...” Kurama whispered, his eyes back up on the canopy as he lay flat on his back again. A few more silver leaves fell into his hair. “I needed that.”
   “Mmm.”
   Kazuma looked away from the clearing, realizing what an important and personal scene he’d just been private witness to. Maybe it had been wrong of him to watch when it was so rare, like the birth of a child or the departing of the soul from a body; this was not something he should have seen... but he’d seen it none the less.
   And he couldn’t believe it, in spite of himself.
   Hiei’s love, only rumored until now, openly on display as he hugged Kurama. What the hell had made him so brave to do that? Kazuma could hardly blame Kurama for the look of shock and awe that he had worn as Hiei had wrapped his arms around his neck. Never in living memory had Hiei done such a thing.
   Would he ever do it again? Kazuma doubted it.

   It was strange, to walk back to the BUG at a slow and leisurely pace, but he could no longer hear screams and knew that the fight was officially over. Perhaps, in a way, they had accomplished their goal. Kurama had certainly seemed more at ease upon the forest floor than he had in quite a while, but Kazuma was determined to stay in demon world until Kurama told him he was ready to go home.
   When he’d arrived back at the lift and reentered the BUG, he’d wandered aimlessly above the upper floors, wondering what he’d find. He was really curious to see where the control was, and knew if he followed the main wiring connection that ran above his head he would find it. Kazuma could sense Kurama’s energy nearby, but didn’t run into him in the halls, and was surprised when he felt the BUG beginning to move beneath his feet. At first he worried that Kurama would be left behind with Hiei in the forest, but then he sensed Kurama’s energy somewhere above his head and knew that Kurama was on board. Perhaps he was on the upper terrace.
   Kazuma traveled up, wondering if he’d run into Kurama, but did not see him as he hit the top floor. The wiring above his head was thickest here, and he was certain that the control room was somewhere on this floor. His sense of direction told him that the ‘head’ of the BUG (if one could say it had a head) would be at the end of the hall, and so he traveled all the way down to where he found a pair of sliding mechanical doors that opened wide to reveal-
   Ah. A control room. Kazuma smiled in spite of himself.
   Kirin was at the helm, which was a large wiring board full of switches and gears that blinked periodically when in use. Before them was a massive window, slightly rounded like a Cyclops eye would be, and through it Kazuma could see the mountains of the north looming in the distance. To his right, large monitors flashed above the halls, showing camera views of soldiers on patrol and at their stations. He did not see Kurama in any of these.
   Still, he knew Kurama was close. His energy hummed pleasantly in the back of Kazuma’s mind.
   “Wow...” Kazuma greeted Kirin, walking up from behind to view the control board over Kirin’s shoulder. This room was spacious for a control center, so that several men could easily access it at the same time... a smart move. “This is pretty cool.”
   “Quite.” Kirin agreed, his eyes crinkling behind his eye slit to tell Kazuma he was smiling again. “A fine beast, isn’t she?”
   “In my world, I build things; I can appreciate the aesthetic,” Kazuma said. “I’m an architect.”
   “We have such men here,” Kirin said.
   “I guess the BUG appeals to me in that way.” Kazuma shrugged, quite at ease with his newfound friend. Hiei could go take a flying leap, Kirin was pretty darn cool to him.
   “Would you care to steer it?” Kirin offered in jest.
   “Well, I don’t really know where we’re going.” Kazuma snorted, but Kirin stepped back and Kazuma realized he was going to let him actually drive the BUG! Leaping to the controls lest they fall slack, Kazuma kept his hands upon the levers and felt the power hum beneath them. He looked at Kirin who nodded his head once to show that Kazuma was doing as he was supposed to.
   “Wow...” Kazuma said again, feeling quite powerful all of a sudden at the helm.
   He wished Kurama could see this.
   “Do you see those mountains in the far north?” Kirin pointed; Kazuma nodded, “That’s bandit territory, and it’s becoming a pain in the ass for Enki, our king. We have orders to comb it for ruffians and thugs, so that portals are no longer threatened.”
   “What are they called?”
   “The Norikura Range. They are our destination.”

   Kazuma heard the doors sliding open behind him, but did not look around. He didn’t want to take his eyes off of the road, though to be fair there really wasn’t a road; even if there was, this BUG could tear the hell out of anything it crossed. His best move was to cut around the forest and avoid trampling the trees.

   “Kirin,” came Mukuro’s smoky voice. Kirin turned, and greeted her with a silent gesture of his fist to his heart. It was a strange move, and one that Kazuma might expect of a soldier. Perhaps Kirin was finding it difficult to break the habit now that Mukuro was no longer a ‘demon king’ or whatever the hell Yusuke had said.
   “Are you relinquishing your controls to such a creature as this human?” Mukuro said, but her voice was kind and clearly joking.
   “I fear I am,” Kirin joked back. Mukuro went to stand by the monitors, flicking through them with a remote control at her leisure.
   “I may see you unfit for duty if such madness persists.” Mukuro winked at Kirin, who snorted softly under his breath; clearly Mukuro would never call Kirin unfit for duty even if he was mad.
   “Hey, I’m a good driver,” Kazuma dared to join in, though he never took his eyes off the road, “I just don’t know how to turn or break." He could not help but laugh aloud at himself.
   “I assure you if either were required I would alert you," Kirin said. “Just keep us forward.”
   So Kazuma did.
   “Mukuro, do you know where Kurama is?” Kazuma asked, wondering if she’d seen him about the BUG.
   Mukuro turned on a monitor with her remote, and it fuzzed to reveal a scene from atop the upper terrace. There were Kurama and Hiei, both on the roof and both looking quite at ease as they sat side by side. Kurama was still dirty and bloodied, and Hiei had a cut on his face that ought to be taped, but neither seemed eager to fix their wounds. Instead, they were relaxing after their battle and enjoying the open air.
   “I guess they wanted some alone time.” Kazuma shrugged, at ease with it, “You know, they were hugging in the forest-“ He caught Mukuro’s eyes. Her good eye crinkled with amusement as she smiled. Kazuma knew she would appreciate the meaning behind those words, given that Hiei was not the ‘hugging’ type.
   She suddenly seemed very happy and reached up to touch the monitor were Hiei’s face was showing. Her metal fingers soothingly stroked the glass.

   Kirin snorted, shaking his head. Mukuro caught Kazuma’s eye again, dropping her bionic hand from the screen.
   “Kirin does not enjoy Hiei’s company,” Mukuro explained softly.
   “I would prefer comments from a bloated corpse than that snide upstart,” Kirin concurred.
   Kazuma said nothing, having often shared the sentiment himself, but he noticed Mukuro reached back up to touch the screen again. Hiei looked over his shoulder, oddly right at the camera; Mukuro touched his face.
   Her love was obvious in those tiny moments when she thought no one was looking.

   As night began to fall, Kirin took over the controls again to weave the BUG through villages spaced out around the massive fields of demon world. Storms unleashed from above, and both Hiei and Kurama left the upper terrace in escape from the rain. Kurama came into the control room, perhaps following Kazuma’s energy, perhaps not, but he certainly did smile when he saw Kazuma relaxing against a bench, and sat next to him as Kazuma reached up to heal his bruised face with his own energy.
   “Did Hiei really have to beat you up this much?” Kazuma asked.
   “Yes.” Kurama laughed softly, Kazuma’s thumb catching upon his cracked lip. “Yes, he did.”
   “Well, I may just have to clobber the little shit,” Kazuma murmured, his voice soft and low.
   Kirin, at the controls, cast Kazuma a glance. “Hiei is relentless. He knows no mercy.”
   Kurama looked over his shoulder, and his smile slipped a little as he regarded Kirin.
   “... I’m afraid I must disagree,” Kurama said. “Hiei can be very merciful when he is properly motivated.”
   “A true man requires no motivation to bestow mercy.” Kirin was unswayed. Kurama made a noise in the back of his throat, his smile slipping some more.
   “It ought to be something that you do without motivation.” Kazuma added, for he couldn’t help but agree with Kirin. Kurama looked at him agog; Kazuma winced. “I mean, you gotta admit-“
   “And so the men that threatened my mother or you family during our times of trial... did they deserve mercy?” Kurama asked. “Aniki Toguro and the like?”
   “Well, I mean, no-!” Kazuma flustered.
   “And the men who beat and raped Yukina during her imprisonment, did they deserve mercy?”
   “Hell no!” Kazuma snapped, slightly angry that such a thing could even be suggested. Those men deserved to fry in hell!
   “Well, okay then.” Kurama relaxed, perching jauntily upon the bench as he gave Kirin a cold glance. “I’m glad you and Hiei are on the same page.”
   “I....” Kazuma could see Kurama was irritated at him, but dammit he had his own point to prove. Surely Kurama couldn’t have forgotten the millions of times Hiei had been an asshole to him. Did those count for nothing? Was he supposed to just toughen up and deal with the fact that a friend thought him a moron?
   “He’s a real asshole to me, alright?” Kazuma grumbled. Kurama looked at him, aware of his displeasure. “I have resentment over that, I admit it-“
   “Hiei does not understand the definition of a friend,” Kirin added. “It is a word that is vacant from his vocabulary.”
   Kurama looked at Kazuma wide eyed, waiting to see what he would say in reply.
   On the one hand, he had witnessed a powerful and moving hug not hours ago.
   On the other...
   “... You gotta admit, he could treat his friends a little bet-“ Kazuma began. Kurama scoffed, pulling away from Kazuma’s arms and jerking up from the bench on which they sat to storm out of the control room. Kazuma leapt up, following after him, and knew that Kirin’s eyes were upon him.
   “Kurama, wait-!”
   He followed Kurama down a flight of stairs to the fourth floor, and as he whipped out of the stair well and around a corner, he suddenly ran smack into Hiei who was talking to Kurama with a derisive look upon his face. Kazuma stumbled, jerking out of the way to avoid knocking Hiei over-!
   “Dammit, Hiei-!” Kazuma scorned. Did he always have to be right in the way?
   Kurama was glaring coolly at him, but Kazuma would not be dissuaded. He had a point and he was going to make it. Right here in front of Hiei if need be!
   “Look, I’m sorry!” Kazuma snapped, “But I don’t like being called a moron every five seconds.”
   “But you are one,” Hiei said with a sneer.
   “You shut the fuck up!” Kazuma spat at Hiei, lunging at him, but Hiei vanished into a pocket of air so that Kazuma nearly fell to the floor for a second time as Hiei re appeared behind him. “See!?” Kazuma demanded, whirling upon Kurama whose cool glare now had turned into something more heated and irritable. “This is exactly what I’m talking about! Right here!”
   “Hiei...” Kurama warned, “Kazuma is a not a moron. Please do not refer to him as such-“
   “Am I to be censored now, for his comfort?” Hiei scoffed, his arms folded over his chest. Damnit, Kazuma hated it when he used that contemptuous tone.
   “Understand me, Hiei, his self-confidence was very low when we first fell in love,” Kurama warned, and suddenly Kazuma was flushing with embarrassment as Hiei scowled. “He was too afraid to even tell me his feelings for seven years because he thought himself unworthy. Please do not further cement that thought!”
   Hiei looked away, eyes narrowing.
   “And you!” Kurama rounded on Kazuma, pointing a finger like a knife. Kazuma pursed his lips, hating for Kurama to use such a tone on him. “I expected better from you! Kirin does not understand Hiei; Kirin knows very little of Hiei, and cares nothing for him-“
   “Tch.” Hiei scoffed, “As if I need loyalty from such a mindless dullard.”
   “But you know Hiei!” Kurama continued on, eyes wide and imploring, “You fought alongside him- when Sensui threatened to destroy everything you cherished, Hiei was by your side! Do you forget that?”
   “He was there because of Yusuke! Not me-“ Kazuma snapped, but before Kurama could say anything, Hiei cut across them both.
   “A fashionable idea,” Hiei sneered, giving Kazuma an ugly grin. “Yet one that is incorrect; I was there because I wanted to fight someone with saint energy. The boy’s fate mattered very little to me. Kill or be killed, that is the way of the world.”
   “In other words-“ Kurama cut across Hiei before he could say anything else rude. “Yes, you did care about Yusuke and you were very upset when Yusuke died.”
   Hiei narrowed his eyes with a scowl.
   “But that’s exactly what I’m talking about!” Kazuma cried out, gesturing to Hiei who sneered at him, “Why not just come straight out and say ‘yes, Yusuke is my friend, I was broken hearted when I saw him die!’. Why the bullshit?! Why the lies?!”
   At this, Hiei reached for his sword, eyes glaring upon Kazuma. The pair of them were facing off, charring up-
   “Are you calling me a liar?” Hiei snarled, learning in so that Kazuma could see the shadows underneath his almond eyes, as deep and purple as thinly rimmed bruises.
   “Are you really gonna deny it, shrimp?!” Kazuma replied, ready for a fight. Yet before one could break out, Kurama reached forward. In the same move he knocked Hiei’s sword back into its sheath and pushed Kazuma back from Hiei so that the pair of them had their space.
   “... He doesn’t say it because he can’t. You know that.” Kurama’s eyes bore into Kazuma’s own.
   Hiei scoffed in the silence. He turned on his heel and walked down the fourth floor corridor. “I don’t have time for this nonsense,” was all that he said as he vanished around a corner and disappeared from sight.
   Kurama shook his head, turned, and made for their room. Kazuma followed hot on his heels, just as irritable as Kurama. Yet he didn’t show it till both of them were over the threshold and the door was closed securely behind them.
   “You can’t tell me that’s normal!” Kazuma snapped angrily as Kurama slumped upon the trunk at the foot of their bed, scowling again. “That treating your friends like shit is natural and shouldn’t be curbed!”
   Kurama slammed a fist onto the trunk.
   “Kazuma, you know he has difficulties!” Kurama rose off the trunk, beginning to pace; suddenly here was the Kurama he hadn’t seen in weeks, the Kurama that was engaged and brilliant, cunning as he poked into every corner of a problem for an answer; had they not been fighting he would have been thrilled. “Why do you throw them in his face?”
   “I’m trying to understand, Kurama! It’s a little difficult when I’m being shitted on every five minutes!”
   “That’s just his way! Hiei is defensive, he puts up walls, he keeps people out-“
   “But just today, I caught a glimpse of Hiei holding you-!” Kazuma flushed when Kurama looked around at him. He was surprised, still Kazuma pushed onward. “He doesn’t always keep people out!”
   “Yes, if Hiei decides you are trustworthy, that you will not plunge a knife into his back, he will open up-“ Kurama agreed, but Kazuma threw up a hand.
   “I would never plunge a knife into his back!” Kazuma snapped.
   “He knows that!”
   “Then why does he treat me-“

   “Because you are open!” Kurama shouted the phrase, and it was strange but so accurate that Kazuma was taken aback. Open? Hiei did not like him because he was open?
   “Explain,” Kazuma said, crossing his arms over his broad chest.
   “Because you are open, and honest, and you do not have to be afraid; Hiei is none of those things, and it’s because he is scared. He is scared to death of trusting, and you do it so easily... so warmly... go genuinely.... Hiei can’t do it; Kazuma he can’t even tell Yukina that he loves her-“

   “Does he love her?” Kazuma snorted.
   The look Kurama gave him was one of anger, true and honest anger that made him realize what a reproachable thing he’d just said.
   “Yes,” Kurama said, his tone completely different. He glared at Kazuma as he spoke, the heat in his words not high in volume but deep in meaning. Kazuma looked away, very embarrassed.
   “If Yukina died, Hiei would be...” Kurama gestured about, open mouthed, “Doomed.” He settled on the word with utmost care. “He would not wait to commit suicide as I did; the minute he found out, he would plunge his sword into his breast... because life would not be worth living anymore.”
   Kazuma sighed, not saying a word. He should never have insisted Hiei did not love Yukina. He knew now that that was wrong. Still, the damage was done; he could not unsay the words.
   “He adores her,” Kurama murmured, thoughtful now with no more anger in his voice as he truly considered the matter at hand, “the very ground she walks on is sacred to him. Because she is his twin, his copy, and is so loving and good... she is everything on the outside that he cannot be. Because-“ Kurama stopped, toying for words again, “I suppose because someone told him in his youth that it was wrong to trust and foolish to love-"
   “Well, they were wrong,” Kazuma growled, eyes back on Kurama. He hoped Kurama was not still mad at him. For a moment they simply looked at one another, sizing each other up. Usually so well in synch, it was rare that they did not see eye to eye on a topic. It did not seem to sit right with Kurama, who crossed his arms over his chest and tried to find common ground with Kazuma.
   “Kazuma, when you were little and you were afraid, who did you run to?” Kurama asked.
   “My dad,” Kazuma replied. “Or my sister.”
   “And what did they say to you? What did they do?” Kurama asked.
   “Protected me, consoled me-“ Kazuma tried to remember his childhood, tried to recall moments of fear.
   “Lifted you up, praised you, told you everything would be alright...” Kurama continued on. Kazuma nodded.
   “Imagine if they weren’t there,” Kurama said. Kazuma stiffened. “Imagine you had no one, or worse had someone cruel. How would that have changed you?”
   It was a fair question, and it deserved a fair answer. Kazuma mused on it, thinking of Yusuke and how Atsuko had never exactly been mother of the year. As Kazuma had grown up to defend the territory of his neighborhood, Yusuke had grown up to fight simply for the urge of violent release. He’d trusted no one save Keiko, and had had such a nasty temper that most children their age had avoided him altogether. The isolationism had been the final nail in the coffin, making Yusuke into a cemented teenage delinquent who skipped school, fought constantly, and consorted with dark men in dark corners.
   He supposed that he might have grown up somewhat like that.
   “Hiei is... very afraid,” Kurama began again, his voice soft. It was as if he was nervous Hiei might enter the room and hear him saying such things. Kazuma caught his eye, his fingers drumming upon his lips but still listening. “He’s afraid because someone made him afraid. When you look at him, don’t see the adult. See the child. See the young boy that’s been kicked and beaten and left to sob in the dirt. I assure you... everything will make sense if you do. Hiei is not a lost cause, he is a lost soul. There is a difference.” Kurama gave him a reproachful smile, “He needs people who will understand and support him. People like Mukuro and Yusuke-“
   “And you,” Kazuma added in.
   “And you,” Kurama finished. Kazuma did not agree and shook his head.
   “He needs you,” Kurama soothed, taking a step forward and placing a hand upon Kazuma’s breast directly over his heart, “He will never say it, he certainly has never said it to anyone else, but he needs you.”
   Kazuma still wasn’t convinced.
   “How do you know that this isn’t all some joke, that he isn’t really a fucking prick to the bone?” Kazuma asked. “Where is my proof?”
   “In his eyes," Kurama answered. “The next time that you argue with him, look into his eyes. You will see the fear there. If it was a joke, the fear would not exist. Nothing is funny when you are afraid... I should know.”
   At this, Kurama looked down and away, lamenting on something Kazuma was not privy to. Kazuma sighed, reaching up and stroking Kurama’s face.
   “... I’m sorry.” Kazuma murmured, “I’m sorry, baby, I didn’t mean what I said about... Yukina.”
   “I know,” Kurama assured him. He leaned in and Kazuma held him; it was incredibly lovely, to cradle his chin atop Kurama’s fluffily chopped hair. He kissed Kurama’s brow beneath him.
   Outside, the storm raged on.
- 5
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